8 Things Not to Say to Someone With Eczema and What to Say Instead
People living with severe eczema often face an array of unsolicited advice, awkward questions, and insensitive remarks from friends, family, and strangers alike, according to experts. Managing a chronic skin condition requires round-the-clock physical care and carries a heavy emotional toll, yet well-meaning loved ones frequently rely on dismissive clichés like telling patients to stop scratching or minimizing the diagnosis as a simple rash.
Why Telling Someone to Stop Scratching Makes Eczema Worse
Telling someone to just stop scratching during an itchy flare can feel dismissive and confrontational, according to Atlanta-based media production company owner Jeremy Paredes, who has lived with severe eczema since infancy. Peter Lio, a clinical assistant professor of dermatology and pediatrics at Northwestern University’s Feinberg School of Medicine, explains that such remarks usually make individuals feel more upset without actually helping them manage the physical urge. Rather than policing a loved one’s movements, close friends can offer practical assistance, such as fetching an ice pack or retrieving lotion to help soothe the skin, as Paredes notes his own friends do.
Navigating Misunderstandings About Diet and Triggers
Another common misconception involves linking eczema directly to dietary choices, such as the assumption that eliminating specific foods will instantly cure the condition. According to Dr. Lio, eczema stems from a complex interaction between genetics, immune system function, and environmental triggers, meaning it is rarely as straightforward as cutting out a food or two. Jennifer Moyer Darr, a licensed clinical social worker and pediatric behavioral health team manager at National Jewish Health in Denver, points out that questions about diet often place misplaced blame on patients or parents. Instead of questioning a loved one’s eating habits, supporters can offer to help them connect with a trusted allergist or dermatologist if medical testing is genuinely needed.
Understanding the Reality of Contagion and Visibility
Eczema is not contagious, yet patients frequently encounter people asking if their skin condition can spread through touch or casual contact, according to Moyer Darr. These questions, while sometimes originating from curious children, often hurt the self-esteem of individuals who already feel self-conscious about their skin. Paredes recalls spending his childhood wearing long sleeves to hide his rashes and avoid public scrutiny. When people express genuine curiosity politely, however, Paredes views it as a valuable opportunity to educate the public and advocate for the global eczema community.
Recognizing the Emotional and Physical Toll Beyond a Rash
Minimizing severe eczema as just a rash overlooks both the physical severity of the condition and its impact on mental health. Paredes spent nearly a week hospitalized at age 17 for septic shock after an infection entered his bloodstream through open skin wounds. Research also shows that individuals with eczema face a higher risk of developing anxiety and depression, according to findings cited by medical specialists. Experts advise that friends and family members should avoid unsolicited product recommendations or minimizing comments, and instead ask supportive questions about how their loved ones are feeling.
