Raising Independent Kids: Why I Let My 8-Year-Old Walk to School Alone

José R. Mendoza lets his 8-year-old daughter walk to school alone and taught her to cook at age 7, aiming to foster the same independence he experienced growing up in El Salvador.

Mendoza grew up in El Salvador, where his parents encouraged independence from a young age. At about 6 years old, he would go pick up small items at the corner store or grab tortillas by himself. A couple of years later, he started walking to his elementary school alone, about 1 kilometer away. When he was 10, he began helping his parents with sales at their tiendita business in front of their house.

Now raising his two children, ages 8 and 1, in the United States, Mendoza wants them to have similar independence, though he acknowledges it looks different in the U.S. Context. He and his wife are intentionally creating opportunities for their oldest daughter to explore the world on her own.

Walking to School Alone

The family began practicing the route to school with their daughter leading the way, stopping to look both ways at the stop sign, and confirming it was safe to cross. When she turned 8, she expressed her desire to walk to school by herself. Although Mendoza admitted his heart sank at the idea, he felt she was ready.

For her 8th birthday, they let her walk to school alone for the first time. Mendoza described it as a proud moment that gave him peace of mind, especially knowing they could see her cross the only street she had to navigate alone. A minute after she arrived, the school crossing guard texted his wife to confirm their daughter had reached the school grounds safely and agreed to send a thumbs-up emoji each time she crossed the street.

Teaching Responsibility Through Pet Care

The daughter’s journey toward independence began earlier. When she was 3, she started asking for a dog. After getting one, the family gradually increased her responsibilities for its care. At age 7, she began taking the dog out in the front yard by herself. While she is still learning to pick up the dog’s waste consistently, she generally handles the task independently and is also in charge of feeding and playing with the pet, though she still needs occasional reminders.

Early Entrepreneurship: The Lemonade Stand

Mendoza, who learned about money and hard work early in life in El Salvador, wanted his daughter to understand those values too. When she was 4 and a half years old, they helped her set up her first lemonade stand. They bought lemons at the grocery store, and he taught her how to make homemade lemonade — washing, squeezing, adding sugar, and stirring. He also guided her on serving customers. The first stand was successful; despite selling lemonade for only $1 a cup, she earned over $60, mostly from tips. The stand has since become an annual tradition, and Mendoza believes she will soon be ready to run it independently.

Learning to Cook

When his daughter turned 7, Mendoza began teaching her to cook. Last summer, he showed her how to make pupusas (a Salvadoran dish), omelets, pasta, and pancakes. On the morning he wrote the essay, she made pancakes for the entire family from scratch under his supervision — collecting ingredients, mixing them, and cooking them in a frying pan. He noted she did well but still needs more practice flipping them.

Looking Ahead

As his daughter grows older, Mendoza plans to continue supporting her independence and hopes his youngest child will follow her example. He also aspires to mirror his parents’ approach by teaching both children to drive in their early teenage years, instilling a strong work ethic, and ensuring they know how to live and care for themselves by adulthood.