Summer Family Visits: Tradition & Meaning

I’ve always looked forward to summer, knowing it meant spending extended time with my grandparents and family in Virginia. It was such a familiar and joyful routine that everyone around me knew about it. It became a special part of my life, and when my little sister was born seven years later, she started joining us for those summer visits too. Now, at 26, I still include that summer trip in my adult routine, and it struck me during a session of online discourse about whether people are losing the tradition of “going away for the summer.”

Olivia Hancock, 25, makes it a priority to visit her grandfather’s house every July, and whenever she mentions it in her social circles, she’s always met with some surprise. Since things are moving at such a rapid pace throughout the remote era, many people are losing the recipe of what it means to spend summer with family. “With people being so busy in their day-to-day lives, I think a lot of people aren’t stopping to take the time to visit their family,” she told EBONY. “My mom was raised going to see her grandparents in North Carolina every summer and every Christmas, so that’s something she’s continued with her kids.”

This longing for connection, rooted in our family histories, raises the question: What will the future of summer traditions hold? It’s no secret that the pandemic and the rise of the digital age have impacted how we connect, including our extended family. There’s a high possibility that Gen Z and Gen Alpha might not have the same experience or understand the cultural significance of visiting family during summer break and carrying that tradition into their adulthood. 

For cousins Mariah Maddox, 27, and Ashley Jones, 35, their fondest memories stem from the extended visits at Maddox’s childhood home, where they were able to build a sense of community. “[My] cousins were the first introduction to deeper relationships,” Maddox told EBONY. “A lot of people talk about cousins being like your built-in best friends, so having those experiences with my cousins, whether the same age or older, taught me a lot about just having a sense of belonging, while also kind of like fostering an understanding of what it means to be in relationship or be in community with other people.”

No matter where you’re located, having those quality moments with relatives you might not see throughout the year can set the tone for how you view and interact with your family. Intergenerational bonding is undeniable and can have a lasting impact on you. “I didn’t have any sisters, and I’m the only girl child, but I have a lot of female cousins, so they were kind of like stand-in sisters for me,” Jones said. 

As a kid, summer meant a chance to regroup and spend time with people you don’t see often. For Alexia McKay, 35, although she has two older siblings with a significant age gap of 17 and 11 years, she grew up mostly as an only child. She recalls her summer visits as a time to hang out with her cousin, who was only a few months older. Whether it was their love for theme parks or Pretty Ricky, that time helped her build a foundation of reassurance, knowing that she wasn’t alone. 

“What was embedded in me growing up was the importance of family, knowing your roots and where you’re from,” she said. “Now, with my generation, we’re pretty much next in line to be the elders in the family…you don’t think about these things [until] you’re older, and the elders and your families are dying out, when you really try to start to think about your family and your legacy.”

As time passes and the days of recalling visits to your grandparents or cousins fade into memories, many of us are growing older and starting new chapters, like becoming parents. It has become more important to preserve these memories and family connections in the lives of your children and the next generation. 

For L’Oreal Thompson Payton, 37, it was only after she became a mother that she truly understood the importance of her family’s memories. “I distinctly remember one day my mom came to pick us up from my grandparents’ house, and I might have been complaining that my grandfather told the same story for the 100th time, and she’s like, ‘You know, like one day he’s not going to be here,’” she said. “I really wanted to get closer to my grandfather, learn more about the family tree.”

This reflection ignited a passion in her to preserve her family’s legacy, so that her daughter can absorb those same stories in the later years. “As a parent now myself, I’m like, ‘Oh, I get it,’ and I am counting down like the years until we can send our daughter to either my parents in Maryland or my husband’s mom in Ohio,” she said.

As we navigate through the complexities of modern life, the importance of maintaining family connections and traditions becomes more important than ever. The stories and experiences shared during those summer visits give us character and create memories that last a lifetime, shaping our identities and forming generational bonds. 

By prioritizing time with loved ones and fostering intergenerational relationships, we not only honor our roots but also ensure that the values of family and community continue to thrive. Ultimately, these connections become the foundation upon which we build our legacies, reminding us of the significance of togetherness and the cherished memories that shape who we are.

“[Take] opportunities to sit with your elders…when you are around your grandparents, take the time to ask them questions,” Hancock said. “Gen Z and Gen Alpha need to prioritize the connection that they have with their grandparents, and then continue to foster that with their children because Gen Z is now having kids so, even if you come from the most close knit family, you can break that curse, and foster it with your kids.”