Women Becoming More Like Men – The Irish Times
Summary of the Article: The Complicated State of Modern Romance
This article explores the surprisingly persistent difficulties in romance despite (adn perhaps because of) increased gender equality. The author, reflecting on her own past writing on the subject, expresses disappointment that the “battle of the sexes” hasn’t subsided as she’d hoped.
Here are the key points:
Shifting Power Dynamics: As women have gained more independence and entered traditionally male-dominated spaces, the dynamics of courtship have become more complex.
Failed Expectations of Equality: The expectation that conventional courtship “games” (like waiting to be chased or having tabs picked up) would disappear with equality hasn’t materialized.
Male Uncertainty: Many men feel “rudderless” as they lag behind women in areas like education and struggle with traditional provider roles. They also report increasing social isolation.
Resentment & Frustration: Both men and women express frustration and resentment towards the opposite sex, often voiced on social media.
Digital Complications: Dating apps and social media, while intended to connect people, have introduced new layers of complexity and anxiety to dating.
New Dating Terminology: A whole new vocabulary has emerged to describe modern dating behaviors – “ghosting,” “submarining,” “breadcrumbing,” “limerence,” etc.- wich ironically resemble the manipulative tactics outlined in older advice books like “The Rules.”
* A Cycle of Games: The author points out the unsettling similarity between modern dating strategies and the manipulative advice of the past, suggesting a cyclical pattern of games and anxieties in the pursuit of romance.
In essence, the article argues that while societal roles have changed, the underlying anxieties and power dynamics in relationships remain surprisingly persistent, and are now amplified by the complexities of the digital age.
