Singapore Adults Take Communication Course
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The COVID-19 pandemic has left many grappling with a decline in their social confidence and interaction skills. Dr. Lim notes that individuals predisposed too introversion, social anxiety, or neurodivergent traits like autism or ADHD have been particularly affected. “We now see patients who are not just shy but socially deconditioned – they’ve lost confidence and fluency,” she observes. “More young patients describe symptoms like ‘feeling like I don’t know how to be human anymore’.”
Social deconditioning refers to the loss of ease and proficiency in social interactions due to prolonged periods of reduced social engagement. This can manifest as increased anxiety in social settings, difficulty initiating conversations, and a general feeling of awkwardness or inadequacy when interacting with others. For those already managing conditions like social anxiety or neurodevelopmental differences, the extended isolation of the pandemic exacerbated these challenges, leading to a significant impact on their ability to connect with others.
The Impact on Confidence and Fluency
The lack of regular social practise can erode the confidence built through years of interaction. This can lead to a cycle were the fear of negative social experiences reinforces avoidance, further diminishing social skills. Young people,in particular,are at a crucial developmental stage where social interaction is key to forming identity and building relationships. The disruption to these formative experiences can leave them feeling adrift and unsure of how to navigate social norms and expectations.
Fortunately, regaining social fluency is achievable with targeted strategies and a willingness to re-engage. Experts recommend a gradual and supportive approach to help individuals overcome their anxieties and rebuild their social muscles.
Exposure therapy: A Gradual re-entry
Dr. Chow advocates for exposure therapy as a powerful tool for rebuilding confidence. This approach involves gradually exposing individuals to social situations, starting with low-pressure scenarios and progressively moving towards more challenging interactions. This might begin with simple greetings, then progress to brief conversations with acquaintances, and eventually to more complex social events. The key is to create positive experiences that counter negative expectations.
Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT): Reframing Anxious Thoughts
Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) offers another effective pathway to social recovery. CBT helps individuals identify and challenge negative thought patterns that fuel social anxiety. As an example,a common anxious thought like “they’re judging me” can be reframed into a more balanced perspective,such as “they’re probably focused on the conversation,not critiquing me.” By learning to reframe these thoughts, individuals can reduce their anxiety and approach social situations with greater self-assurance.
Beyond therapeutic interventions,several practical techniques can substantially improve social engagement and foster deeper connections.These tips, shared by Tham Jun Han, co-founder of Friendzone, focus on creating cozy and meaningful interactions.
Small Talk: The Foundation of Connection
Small talk serves as an essential icebreaker, setting a comfortable and open tone for conversations. To initiate, try anchoring on a shared experience or observation. Sharing a brief, relevant personal anecdote can also make you more relatable.Crucially, encourage the other person to share by asking open-ended questions, demonstrating your interest in them.
Moving from Surface to Substance
Begin conversations with lighter, more general topics such as the weather or a recent shared event.As comfort grows, gradually transition to deeper subjects. Asking questions that invite personal stories or reflections can foster a sense of connection.Exchanging these personal narratives helps others feel seen and understood, which is basic to building trust and emotional bonds.
Mastering the Art of Listening
Active listening is paramount in any social interaction. Pay close attention to what the other person is saying, both verbally and non-verbally.Observe their body language for clues about their comfort and engagement. By asking follow-up questions that demonstrate you’ve been listening and are genuinely interested in their perspective, you show respect and investment in the conversation, strengthening the connection.